Deliberate Self-Care

You may not always know when, or where you might need some self-care, which is why we need to be a little more deliberate about it.

We do need to make sure we're taking care of ourselves, in all areas of our lives: physical, spiritual, emotional and mental.

This requires constantly and consistently paying attention to your needs.

Are you taking care of yourself?

​Read more below.

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Are you taking care of yourself?

There are so many different aspects of yourself, and for each person who is reading or listening to this, you'll interpret it differently.

If your body is stretched, you'll be thinking this has to do with taking care of your body.

If your relationships are testing you, you'll be thinking this has to do with boundaries, or speaking your truth, or in general about taking care of yourself in your relationships.

If your business or work are burning you out, you'll be wondering if it's time for some time out, to take some space back away from it, or some distance from what you're doing so that you can gain a higher perspective.

And of course, if you've been lacking in your spiritual connection, feel lost and confused about what life is throwing at you at the moment, you'll be wondering if you're meditating, doing yoga, or journaling enough.

The thing is, it's all of these things. And you might be thinking, "But Suzanne! I can't be thinking of all of these things all the time! I'd never get anything done!"

Oh yes, you would.

In fact, you'd get more done than you ever thought imaginable.

What is 'deliberate self-care'?

Deliberate self-care simply means that it is constantly at the forefront of your mind.

That no matter what comes up, you're thinking about how to take care of yourself, first.

I know this sounds selfish, but it's not. Selfishness would mean that in any situation, you'd be thinking of how you could get the most out of it, or out of someone, without regard to them.

Self-care is about making sure that you're not being stomped on, making sure that your body's needs are being taken care of, and that your not overextending yourself in an effort to win favor, get too much done than is really needed, and generally keep all of your own needs aside.

But, your own needs are what really matter, and they are often what is neglected the most.

Do you know how often we simply ignore our body's request for more water? Or how often do you keep agreeing to do more, when you know you're exhausted and just need a break right now?

When you're living in Divine Flow - all the time -  none of these things happen.

You know exactly that it's time for some water, and you stop and drink some. You know exactly when it's a time for a mind shift, and you choose to take a break and change your mindset or your activities for a while until that shift happens.

You pay attention to your all your needs: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

When your relationships  - whether they be work, community, family or primary - start getting testy, or strange in a way you can't understand in the moment, you might start asking yourself first and foremost: "What do I need right now?"  as a default question throughout the day.

And I guarantee you, you'll get an answer in your mind, immediately. An answer always comes to you when you ask a question of your Higher Self. There are simply no qualms about it. It's quick, it's immediate, simple and clear.

You might start asking yourself first and foremost: "What do I need right now?"  as a default question throughout the day. 

And I guarantee you, you'll get an answer in your mind, immediately. An answer always comes to you when you ask a question of your Higher Self. There are simply no qualms about it.

It's quick, it's immediate, simple and clear.

When the opportunity is given you to take on more, to do more, to broaden your responsibilities and commitments in any way, decide to take a moment to reflect before committing.

A few good questions to ask would be:
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• How is this serving me? 
  • Does it fulfill your dreams, taking forward steps on what you've been wanting to manifest for a while?

 

• Is this something I really want to do, or am I doing it because I think I have to?
  • ​This can stump a few people, because they're not sure. Which is why you need a few minutes to reflect, or even a few days. There's nothing wrong with saying, "I'll get back to you on that." You might just find the answer coming if you sit on it over night. You might also find that person found another solution, and won't need you anymore. Quite simply, by taking a moment to think about it, and expressing that, you send a clear message that your time is valuable to you. And guess what? They got that message!

• • If you're doing something out of obligation, it's time to really dig into why you feel obligated, and if it is really true. Did you make a promise to someone, giving them your word? Then yes, you are obligated because you gave your word. Are you just doing something because you always have? And that's just the way it is? If it doesn't feel good anymore, is it possible for you to step out of that obligation, safely and securely, and still keep those relationships smooth? 


• • Sometime yes, and sometimes no. You decide. (It's also another reason I love coaching, because your coach can reflect back to you what your real thoughts and feelings are about a situation, which can be complicated from your own, internal perspective.


• • If you don't follow this inner guidance about extending yourself too much, pretty soon you'll find yourself back to where you were, being exhausted, depleted, and not having enough time for the things that really make you feel good. And so what can happen? Resentment sets in.

 

• How are my other obligations and responsibilities doing right now?
  • ​If you're over extended, chances are your other obligations and responsibilities are suffering already. Is it time to take stock of what you've got, make sure it's all OK, then decide if you want to take on more?

 

• • Relationships like to have time to be enriched and to grow. Without time, they tend to wither. Don't ignore them, and then expect them to be there when you want them to be. They have suffered neglect, and are now becoming more distant.

 

• Have I been taking well enough care of my body lately?
  • ​You know those late nights when you're indulging in things you know you don't want to be indulging in? It's a pretty sure sign you're overextended, not taking care of yourself and could be headed down a slippery slope. Let's head that off before it gets too out of hand.

• • Start asking yourself more regularly: What do I need right now? And you will discover what a beautiful thing it is, to give yourself exactly what you need, when you need it.

With these thoughts in mind, Deliberate Self-Care can and should be at the forefront of your mind, all throughout the day.

You'll have healthier relationships, a strong and resilient body, and satisfying activities on your plate daily. With all three of these things in tip-top shape, success just becomes a habit.
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You'll be able to stay in the game and be happier for the long-haul, accomplish a great deal more, and never, ever experience any burnout.  It's a constant journey. A marathon, not a sprint. 

People will begin to see it in you, trust you to be steady and reliable, and will come to you for greater opportunities that will serve the whole better.

I am wishing all the greatest self-care you can deliberate over on a daily basis.

Much love,